Are the rumors true?

I know that I just posted a thread about what an atheist looks like, but something kind of weird happened last night.
My wife and I were sitting in our chairs in the living room watching TV (Time Team, we love that show) around 9:30 when my wife’s phone rang, it was our daughter “Bug” (my nickname for her since she and our daughter-in-law share the same name).
She rarely calls that late in the evening, and my wife thought it could be important, so she put her on speaker so I could listen in, and the first thing she says is “has dad found jesus”?
I was thinking"what the hell, no, I haven’t fucking found jesus", but I didn’t say anything at first. My wife said “no?” and then asked the question, where the hell did this come from?
Apparently, my wife put in a “prayer request” at their church to ask people to pray for me to help me deal with my physical and mental problems caused by this past winter, it was pretty brutal here. Depression sucks.
For some reason, my wife’s request wasn’t worded as well as it could have been, and someone at their fucking church thought it meant that I was struggling with my faith and I needed help finding it. This person told our daughter’s mother-in-law about this, and she thought it meant that I’d “found jesus” and asked Bug if it was true.
I think it’s pretty funny, because everyone at their church knows that I’m a godless heathen, and always will be. You can tell as soon as you see me what I am, a pissed-off, long haired, heavily tattooed son of a bitch that doesn’t want to talk to anyone.
Becky looked at me and told Bug “no, dad hasn’t found jesus”, she didn’t think it was true, but she just wanted to know for sure.
I wanted to say that they should cancel Easter this year, they’d found the body, but my wife wouldn’t have thought it was funny, so I didn’t.
I know that I look like a miserable, angry, godless heretic because I always wear a black concert shirt (I have a huge collection, so I wear one every day), long(ish) hair and facial hair, and I’m covered with Halloween/Occult tattooes. When people see me in public, they either go the other way or walk past me without making eye contact.
This is purely intentional, and as long as our grandkids aren’t afraid of me, it’s fine.
“Have I fucking found jesus”? Not a chance in (non-existent) hell!

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Well, of COURSE rumors are true! Duh! Rumors are ALWAYS true. Just ask the people who start them, silly man. :roll_eyes:

That being said, I’m with you on the whole “finding Jesus” thing. I never knew he was lost. My understanding is that he is back in heaven sitting next to his Daddy… uh, himself… Uh, well, anyway, he’s back in heaven, right? And even IF he was lost, why would it be MY responsibility to find him anyway? I mean if an all-knowing GOD can’t find his own son… uh, himself… uh… (damn, I’m getting confused)… anyway, if god can’t find him, what chance would I have of finding him… (as if I would bother looking in the first place).

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Never trust GPS. Those things are wrong almost more than they are right. But if anybody really wants to find Jesus, I would say the most logical place to start looking would be Corpus Christi, TX.

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You can find Jesus everywhere, including jail. It’s a pretty common name.

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My understanding is Jesus is most easily found when landscaping.

Why do we allow so many illegal Jesuses in America?

Please explain and support your position with hard facts because that comment is just dripping with blatant racism.

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I really want to say something about the ignorance of Americans and pair that with being a Christian nation,. but alas, I have been good so far, so I won’t go there. It is so interesting that you asked such a question. Ignoarnce is bliss.

That degenerated fast. I only meant to point out the irony of being able to “find” Jesus in unlikely places due to it being a common name. More irony being what Jesus, if he existed at all, would have looked like. Not lilly white as depicted. I don’t know why the hatefulness of a religion that claims to be about loving one another continues to surprise me. It really shouldn’t by now.

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FOUND HIM!

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onision-fuck-you

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Looks like only TinMan has a sense of humor here. Lol
Good post.

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Re: “Are the rumors true?”

Well, one thing for certain, if they AREN’T true, then somebody has been lying.

“Tin Man” What do you not understand. Made of TIN. No fucking humor at all. That’s like saying your record player has a sense of humor. TIN MAN… garbage in ~ garbage out. And he is scared to death of pugs. Or am I projecting? No. Wait. Yeah, I’m sure. He is scared to death of pugs.

Scared?.. No. Healthy respect?.. Most certainly. And I’m not the one walking around with a rolling pin up my ass, soooo… :grin:

Hey! I’ll have you know that I am in complete control of this relationship. I have White wrapped around my little finger. She does exactly what I tell her to do… Watch this!

HEY WHITE SWEETY, HONEY, BABY, (flattery sometimes works.) YOU TO TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT TO DO okay? I am in complete control.

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I like it a lot…his control over me controlling him.

Yeah, yeah, yeah… Whatever. :roll_eyes: As if YOU are the only man here in control of his woman. For your information, Romeo, I happen to wear the pants in MY relationship. :triumph: (Just as long as they are the ones my wife picks out for me.)

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