I can see your point here. Certainly a fair rebuttal. I accept that methodology does work, at times, but I find the risk of pushing someone towards martyrdom of their cause too likely. I think it has a time and a place. I can admit I still have my moments of wanting to throw it in theists faces and kick them in the teeth. I can’t say I have seen any good results using that method.
I don’t think alcoholism is quite comparing apples to apples. A chemical addiction is quite different from a mental addiction or thought pattern. Shaking someone from substance abuse isn’t the same as someone who isn’t self harming. A bigot isn’t harming himself like a substance abuser is. So I wouldn’t treat them both the same. I think approaching thought patterns like that is what reinforces them. Attacking a person with an addiction is different, they are denying the reality of their own physical harm and the potential they are putting other people at risk of physical harm from their behavior.
Attacking what I would consider a nonviolent irritating personality is much like using a hammer to peel a potato. Personally I think it’s the wrong tool for the job, but I am not here to tell you how to peel a potato.