I will never understand it

My wife got a phone call last night from her older sister with some pretty sad news. One of their son’s little girls was in the hospital for a really serious medical issue. Their older daughter Esa, who is only 7 years old, suddenly started having trouble with her eyesight. She suddenly lost vision in one eye, and could barely see anything with the other.
To make a really long story short, a neurosurgeon at the university of Utah did a brain-scan and determined that she has a cyst on her pituitary gland. The cyst also has 2 tumors attached to it that have grown and almost flattened her pituitary.
He thinks it is something she was born with because she’s very small and immature for her age. Her little sister recently lost 2 baby teeth while Esa hasn’t lost any yet.
They tried to drain the cyst to decrease the pressure on her pituitary, but the surgery didn’t work. So next week, they’re going to have to try and remove the cyst along with the tumors. This is very serious surgery, the doctor said that if she lives, she’ll probably be legally blind for the rest of her life. She’ll be taking hormones for the rest of her life also, along with several other side affects from losing function in her pituitary.
This is obviously horrible news, no little girl should have to endure shit like this. However, my sister-in-law said something that I’ll never be able to understand. She’s extremely concerned for her granddaughter’s future, but she’s more concerned for her son. Apparently he’s not the devout christian that she thought he was, and is more concerned for her son’s faith than her granddaughter’s life.
While we were on the phone, she said this, “I know that god is always there and is always good”. Wait? What the hell is that supposed to mean?
God is always good? Are you fucking kidding me? Why the hell would a god put a 7 year old through something like this and completely destroy her life? If she survives all of this, she’ll be blind, possibly incontinent, morbidly obese, and a whole slew of other after affects from the surgery and the chemo she’ll have to endure to make sure the tumors don’t come back.
This situation is completely fucked up, but my wife and her sister think that this is all god’s will. They’re all going to pray for a “medical miracle”. What a complete waste of time. I’ll never say anything out loud on this subject, but how someone can actually believe this crap is something I’ll never be able to understand.


Because Eve swiped an apple. That is what they told me in Sunday school. :confounded: I didn’t believe it then, either.

Holy hell, Mr.Mac. I hate hearing about anything like that happening to a little kid. I sincerely hope things turn out for the better. And for somebody to somehow believe it is totally acceptable for their god to inflict a child in such a way, it leaves me at a total loss for words… (shaking my damn head)…

And if you cannot vent to your wife and family during all of this, just know you have a place here where you can come to unload. Stay strong, Brother.

I just got an update from my wife, the surgeon has convinced my nephew and his wife to let him try to drain the cyst from the other side of her brain. They’ll try it tomorrow, but if it doesn’t work, she’ll be in the hospital for a week until her major operation. DAMN.

Thanks, I appreciate it. If my wife ever finds out that I’ve posted this here she’ll go completely apeshit.


Brutal! Hang in there and don’t let the crazy shit get you down. The challenge is to shut out the bullshit without shutting out the people. ‘Headphones are a blessing!’ Hang in there.


@mr.macabre13 I cannot express my sympathy for such a terrible situation. Not only for this innocent child, but for you. You are dealing with a profound family tragedy, and this shit gets piled on top.

I have personally faced medical emergencies, and one comfort was to trust the medical experts. If anyone can find a good solution, it is them.

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I’m wearing mine at this very moment.

DAMN, things keep changing. My wife just let me know that the procedure will happen later tonight now.
Makes me think that things are getting worse, definitely not any better.

Hospitals and doctors. Things move fast and can change in an instant. It can be unnerving and un-settling. Hang in there.

I hope for the very best outcome for this little girl.

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This sort of ill reasoning faith circles 'round to Job. How much misfortune can you handle and still maintain your misguided love for god is basically what it’s all about. Very macabre and twisted, more so than anything Edgar Allen Poe ever wrote.

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Let’s just hope the real miracle workers (the doctors) can pull one off.

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How goes things, Mr.Mac?

They did the procedure last night, and at first they thought it would work, but there were complications. The got a drainage tube into the cyst and removed about 60% of the fluid, then the cyst collapsed and pushed the tube out.
Now she has to remain in the hospital for about a week, and then undergo the big surgery to try to remove the cyst and both tumors.
They’re not sure how much damage there is to her pituitary gland, or what the long term prognosis is for her. She has to survive the surgery first, and then go on from there.
I will never understand how theists’ get to the point of throwing up their hands and saying it’s all in god’s hands now. Are you fucking kidding me? It’s up to Isa and her doctors now, along with all of the medical advances that we’ve managed to accomplish.
The messages between my wife and kids all sound like typical theist bullshit, along with their “prayers”. How the hell is any of that going to help a 7 year old little girl survive being in this kind of hell? Life isn’t fair, and this is a perfect example of that.



Basically, they are just sticking their heads in the sand and trying to shut out the reality of the situation. Some people are simply incapable of facing reality. Many others just don’t want to face it. I’ve seen it countless times. Praying and “turning it over to God” is just a coping technique and lame cop-out. (Personal opinion.) Just continue to stay strong. Sometimes you just have to be the sane, rational, and strong one in the group, and it often is not an easy thing to do. Please keep us posted.


@mr.macabre13 Thinking of you and her. I understand things are very rough, be strong.

Theists do not have that, they are unable to cope and must fall back on the god/love/heaven bullshit. That is the only tool they have in their arsenal, an imaginary friend.

But be the better man, remember that they are also going through the same crippling emotions. Lashing out at them at this time is damaging to everyone. Be strong, be silent, let your strength shine through. Maybe they will recognize it, but probably not. They are the weak one, sand in these times of crisis, prove to them one does not need a god.

Thinking of you,bud. Hang in there.


What’s really sad about the situation is that if (and I really hope she does) she pulls through, the damn theists are all going to take credit for their prayers. God listend to us and rewarded us with his grease. Halllaaaalloooyaaaa.

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I got another update from my wife this morning, the doctors decided to send her home for about a week while they try to figure out what would be the best thing to do. She then has to go back to the hospital for the “big” surgery.
I can’t even imagine how scared Isa must be right now. How do you even try to explain to a 7 year old little girl why this is happening to her?
I also have no idea what our nephew and his wife are thinking right now, they’ve asked us to not contact them. I have no idea if they’ve lost their faith because of this, or if it’s gotten stronger(worse).
At a minimum, she’s probably still legally blind, and that might be permanent, along with a list of other shit that might happen after the surgery. She has to survive the operation just to find out, really fucked up situation.

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With behaviors, it gets worse before it (may ) get better. That is basic psychology. So unfortunately, they are presently deep in their prayers and bible.

Thinking of you bud.

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