Demons go high tech & texting

Just above your e-mail on the Satanic Temple was the e-mail from the exorcist on the demons going high tech & texting.

I would agree with cell phones being satanic devices. My employer gave me one under protest.

Pickle me grandmother, an actual exorcist.

Is there no end to the self delusion of gullible ,credulous human beings?

Me? No, I don’t believe in god(s), an afterlife, souls, angels, heaven, hell, fortune telling of any kind, faith healers, mediums or any claims of occult powers, mountain trolls, dragons and fairies at the bottom of my garden. The entirety of my disbelief is for the same reason; a lack of empirical evidence


Right now it’s 0957. 11 degrees celsius outside, a balmy 19 in here. It’s also raining. I think I may retire to the bedroom, crank up the electric blanket and watch Netflix.

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I bet it was an iPhone, they are the tools of the devil.

Seriously though, cell phones, texting? Really?

The Exorcist’s Guide on Demonic Possession:

Step one: turn the cell phone off.
Step Two: write an article on how you defeated Satan’s minions.
Step Three: Collect the royalties and spend it on hookers and cocaine.


“Demons are not God and are not all-powerful. Their abilities are limited and they focus their finite energy according to Satan’s plan.”

I dont accept the existence of demons any more than i accept the existence of a god. If did both exist they could well be the one in the same.
“Demons are not God” this convenient disclaimer from Monsignor Rosetti still conflicts with Isaiah 45:7 where god confesses to creating evil.

But for the sake of burning some of my plentiful lockdown time, I have to ask if the abilities of the demons are limited why would they bother with cell phones and expending energy hacking into one of the many service providers to text exorcists and victims?
According to most “demon possession testimonies” I’ve read dating back hundreds of years, demons already have the ability to appear in real time in front of intended victims or communicate directly with them telepathically. “Voices told me to kill them all!” “They told me to let all the air out of Old Mans tricycle.”

If I got a text from someone who claimed to be a demon, I would naturally assume I was dealing with a malignant troll. If I just heard disembodied nasty voices in my head, or saw some repellent being standing in front of me, impelling me to commit terrible offenses, then I would be terrified. Using telecomunications would just be showing off and minimise impact.
Monsignor Rosetti refers to just three cases suggesting all three were “high-value targets” describing one family as pious, “with priestly and religious vocations among the children” and the other two being the most difficult cases his “team” has yet dealt with.
I am sure the distress of these families is real and they honestly beleive their plight.
But I suggest the families’ religious profiles alone would explain the incidents of ‘possession’. If you really believe in demons then that’s just inviting yourself to imagine them in your life.
The physical texting and erasure of messages, suggests people with malicious intent and technical expertise. High tech harrassment.
As is common knowledge, the world is full of bastards and arseholes. It really has no need for demons of classical imagination.
I am also wary of the Catholic Church’s reliance on tales of possession, demons and the Devil to command the attention and fearful compromise of the faithful.

I can’t give this story any credibility, but then I’m an atheist. Let me know when the high ranking powerful demons start texting low-value targets…, “HI, Grinseed, its me Beezebub, wazzup?..” then again that won’t happen because it would reveal the Devil’s hand, and he apparently doesn’t want anyone to know he is exists…and besides atheists in the Church’s eyes are already doomed.
NO point wasting finite power in possessing Grin; there’s already a nice little lofty perch waiting for him in Hell.


Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha … I needed a good laugh today. “Texting is High Tec.” Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha , I got 6 year old children with cell phones who text mom and dad regularly.

Wisdom of the Bible? Now there is an oxymoron! I love the idea that demons are texting now. You are living in a fantasy world of Wizards and Warcraft.

It’s a really good thing cell phones come with a ‘block’ feature. Have you thought of sprinkling yours with holy water? Hey, here is a solution…

You do know there are Christian Cell Phone Services that can completely block you away from the evil world in which you live.

That’s the christian version. In Judaism, the devil and his minions are god’s servants, not his enemy. How could an omnipotent being possibly have any enemies for more than a nano second?

Thats why I filled them with the Holy Air of Prayer" (actually all I did was fart in them. Blew them up a treat and no demons to be seen)

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i think the death rate from texting while driving is on my side about them being satanic devices.

About all I get on my cell phone are the calls - this is Rachael from the dealer. Did you know your car’s extended warranty is about to expire?

Car has about 180,000 miles on it. I would imagine so.

It doesn’t even come with an option to call back the person who just called me when it is important.

It is faster to look up the number in a phone book & call back than to try to text back.

Sounds like you guys are having more fun with this than I did.

I just noted the subject and forwarded for you to have fun with.

I am a very boring person. I spend most of my time sitting next to my desk quietly doing my calculations. If I want to talk to someone, I am nearly always right next to a landline - WHERE I CAN ACTUALLY HEAR WHAT THE PERSON IS SAYING and have the resources to actually respond to the question.

Is that a quote? Please tell me it’s a quote?

From the link:

“This encouraged me to dive more deeply into demonic texts we have received and to look for any insights or patterns that might help us understand their behavior.”

I think a trained psychiatrist ought to be his first port of call. I think after this and @Drich I may be losing my sense of shock at stupid claims.

You have a phone book and a land line…excuse me but what century are you living in time traveller?


I was thinking the same thing, this is sounding more and more like simple paranoia. Technology is explained by scientific evidence, there is no need or evidence for woo woo.

As for looking up a number and dialling being faster than a text, I’m frankly dubious, and a call-back is not always practical, and of course text messaging mean you can send information instantly to multiple recipients and forget about it, attached documents, photos, add links etc.

This woo woo fear of technology is nonsense sorry. Technology may have down sides, but they have nothing to do with woo woo superstition.

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This is a point Thomas Paine made in his Age of Reason about Christian theology. Instead of displaying attributes of a fair and loving God who could forgive and condone anyone he created, even if they were foolish enough to oppose him, God instead reacts with supreme malice aforethought. Paine could not understand why he would allow a pointless cosmic war for possession of heaven to begin in the first place. A war in which all combatants were immortal, and in which Satan’s side had no hope in hell of winning. What sense was there then in consigning the defeated Satan and his angels/demons to the burning pit of Hades, only to release them all again, to work their revenge by corrupting the hearts and minds and souls of mankind, who really had no hand in any of this, thereby setting them at odds against himself. And to top it all off act innocent of any malfeasance on his part, proportioning blame on everyone else simply because. well he is God afterall. It just seems all so unnecessary, wasteful, tiring, mean-spirited, and malicious.
And to top it off all those mortals who by their massive, spiritual effort win their wings, are to be rewarded by being permitted to worship him 24/7 for Eternity. Hardly a consummation devoutly to be wished says a disappointed Hamlet. It would be difficult to come up with a more dastardly plot than this, but its hard to compete with Christians in the field of speculative eternal rewards and punishments…with maybe only the Muslims as close contenders with their virgins and wine.

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That is can do EASILY on my desk top computer with 2 monitors and access to the server.

Trying to do that on an old flip phone is going back to stone knives and bear skins.

More to the point, why wouldn’t it know they were going to be enemies beforehand if it’s omniscient?

Something doesn’t add up?

Also if he’s the alpha and the omega what does it matter, they’ll be gone eventually.

All in all I’m starting to think the bible is just a cobbled together book of superstitious nonsense.

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With respect (because I do respect you) I can not take this with the serious bent you do. I do not believe in the supernatural.

If one receives such ominous and threatening texts, what does a reasonable person do? They contact the police or service provider, in order to find out who it is. In Canada it is a criminal offense to threaten anyone, this is food for the cops. From the narrative of the story you provided, the recipient plays the victim in a teen horror movie. They passively receive such texts and allow themselves to be victims.

Counterpoint. If demons are texting people why not angels? I have heard theists claim they have an angel watching out for them. How about “I know you are going shopping at 2:00 PM. Please be careful in the parking lot, there will be a crazy fast driver who may come close to you. Your friendly angel”.

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I DON’T take it seriously. That is why I posted it here.

I thought the subject was mostly nuts and this forum seems to rejoice in pulling apart religious nonsense.
I didn’t read the article on the threatening message parts.

I am too busy trying to keep the ‘leaders’ of my religion killing us through barking incompetence.

That is how JPII picked the bishops.

Per the ex-priest working in the ‘HR’ department helping JPII pick bishops in the 80’s - JPII had 3 criteria for picking bishops.

  1. Pretty
  2. Unquestioning loyalty & devotion to JPII - God was irrelevent.
  3. ADAMENT no women priests.

i.e. JPII scoured the planet for the most sadistic, misogynist, morons to put in charge of the Church. IT SHOWS!

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I am Canadian and married to a woman who barely escaped the residential school for First Nation children. They were torn away from their families and great effort was made to strip away all vestiges of their culture. I have heard first-hand account from ones who did survive those places, and it was one of brutal and harsh treatment by the priests and nuns who administered some of the schools.

While I understand that you didn’t believe in texting demons, I don’t understand your criteria for choosing what is nonsense and what isn’t. Did it seem far fetched and ridiculous? Well, yeah, but the basis of all religions is superstitious nonsense. You seem to have a harsh view of your own church, but see no contradiction in an all powerful god allowing people of highly questionable character representing him here on earth and exploiting and misleading his faithful followers.

@Kellii Fleeing has been around here sporadically for awhile. Although she is one of faith, she is a very reasonable person who has her own set of morality, not dictated by her church.

Despite our differences in beliefs, I have a lot of respect for this fine person.