Which is worse, a “Cup is Half Empty,” person or a “Cup is Half Full,” person?
On the one hand, the idiots that run about seeing the doom and gloom in every aspect of life, predicting the worst, and never having enough of anything, while all those around them have more than they have are absolute horrors to be around, their counterparts are no better.
The happy loving; everyone has a good side and all things work out for the best, grin, and bear it because the bad times make you stronger ilk, and their cult-like smiles peering up behind obvious pain and inequities as they die with a smile on their face.
Cup half full person. I can’t stand people who are overly happy. Not because my depression is through the roof, and I don’t know when the last time I felt happiness was, but because it’s annoying.
Both groups are ignoring the fact that obviously someone has already drank from the glass and now you are, presumably, expected to drink from the same. So it is academic which way you view it as you are likely going to contract hoof and mouth disease and that aint pretty.
I had a pessimistic co-worker. One beautiful sunny morning I remarked at how nice it was. His response was “but it’s going to rain tomorrow”. I was tempted to (but did not) punch him in the face.
Personally my glass is always full of happiness. I have faced death and witnessed saddening shit, and that drove me to the position where my mantra is “life is good”.
I am an avid sim racer and co-manage a team. When the shit hits the fan I am the one to dispel gloom and point out the positive aspect. I drive this team, I keep them motivated, I am the one who gets them past bad races.
Why is it the cup is only HALF full or empty? What if the cup issss… … oh, maybe just one-quarter full? That makes it three-quarters empty. Is somebody too bitchy if they point out how empty it is? Or maybe too slap-happy if they are overjoyed at having a quarter of the glass filled? What if it’s the other way around? Three-quarters full, but one-quarter empty? Does the person pointing out the emptiness get his balls kicked? (Which, potentially, could drain his cup down to only one-quarter full.) Is the person happy with the three-quarters full justified in his/her glee?
As for whether I am a “glass half empty” or a “glass half full” person, I would have to say it depends on what is in the glass.
Matches my own perception Mr, Tin. There is a cup and some water. It is! Nice to have if I’m thirsty and easy to ignore if I’m not. Life, to me, like the cup and water, just is. At least I make an effort to see it that way.
While studying for my degree, many of the students would get freaked out over clients’ actions, perspectives, and pathologies. My small and exclusive little study group came up with an expression that served us well. “If a human can do it, it’s natural. Humans have been doing it since the beginning of time.” (Okay, not literally true… humans were not here at the beginning of time. Still, when it comes to human behavior, do you really imagine there is something new under the sun?) The techniques may change due to technology, but seriously, it’s all the same old shit that humanity has done ever since the first fishy humanoid made its way out of the primordial soup. It’s all NORMAL. It all IS. (And then we place values and judgments on it.)
And I thought I was the only one who thinks like that. I try to explain it to my wife and others, and I typically get a blank look. (Or, in some cases, I get “scolded” for being cold-blooded and/or indifferent, depending on the subject matter being discussed.) Life is simply life. Good, bad, or otherwise. People are born, people live, and people die. I have seen the full spectrum of all its good and all its nasty forms over the years. Very little (if anything) really surprises me anymore in regards to what people will do and how they might live their daily lives. If what is in the glass is useful to me, I will use it if needed. If there is not enough in the glass for my purpose(s), then I will improvise if necessary. If whatever is in the glass is of no use to me, I simply disregard it, regardless of how full/empty the glass may be.
This is my exact reasoning as well. From my years working in geriatrics, an ambulance service, and an emergency room, there is pretty much nothing I have not seen or witnessed first hand, or had a hand in. Short of actually pulling a trigger on someone (which I know for a fact I would do) I have experienced every aspect of human existence and torture from birth to death. Life is. And then you get to react to it. “How you react is everything.”
Calling it unfair, horrible, terrible, a tragedy, or wallowing in “How could this happen to me,” serves no useful purpose what so ever. In the 60’s, the expresson was, “Shit happens.” I also liked, “Wherever you go, there you are.” (I always take that to mean, I am here now. Deal with it.) Just some of my little internalized coping scripts that have seen me through life.
I agree wholeheartedly. I have tried to employ this for a long while now. I think that if you have not figured this out, then even if you do have an extreme range of experiences, they may not be as much of a learning experience for you if you are trapped in your emotional responses. I suffered the consequences of this “malady” when I was young. My anger was such that it interfered with my emotional and social growth. Fortunately I had the serendipitous friendships of some older individuals who were of great help to me in letting go of the unnecessary reactive behavior. Add to that a plethora of challenging events, a bunch of time, mix thoroughly, and now it is I who is the calm one, even in the midst of chaotic scenes. I have had a few experiences where nearly everyone around me was frantic and lost in the moment , yet I was more or less detached and almost a casual observer and able to effectively deal with it. By being less emotional, the situation takes on entirely different meanings, and can be a powerful learning tool. I still respond emotionally, but not with wild abandon. I am content much of the time in spite of some very demanding “issues”.
“The power that things have over me, I grant to them”. has been one of mine for a long while, among others.
I guess I could classify this experience as a positive thing because it helped me develop as a person. But it was in a genuine emergency. It involved a jet fighter going down, and the successful recovery of both crew. I was just 21 but I did everything correctly. In fact IMO I did more than what was required.
But the lesson I took away was that in such times of stress and confusion, rely on your training. Be it fighting a fire or giving CPR, just fall back on your training.
Proper training is indeed a major factor in how people handle chaotic situations. An even more important factor, however, is Mental Preparation. It is something they pounded into our heads during the police academy. Run through various imaginary/realistic scenarios in your head and “condition” yourself mentally to react in the best manner possible to mitigate/survive the situation. Do that over and over as often as you can whenever you have the chance. Condition your mind to accept the fact you may have to kill a person during the course of doing your duty. Condition your mind to accept the fact you may end up having to sacrifice your OWN LIFE to SAVE another person. Do that over and over and over during the course of twenty years on the streets facing life & death situations almost daily, and pretty soon you get to the point where very few things faze you much anymore.
He he he … Ever wonder how I can cuss like a sailor. My sweet loving mom was an abusive fucking ass and I was about 21 or 22 when I discovered I was exactly like the bitch though I had been trying to run away from home since I was about 8 years old. I left home at 16 and carried that bitch on my back without knowing it for 6 years. 16 was a wake-up call. I remember the specific day. I completely separated from the woman and realized I no longer had to respond to her crazy shit. I had a choice. I left home soon after that. Assuming I had left her far behind. And one day, there the bitch was, looking back at me in the mirror. I just accept that this was a reality.
You don’t ever get rid of shit. It is always with you. If you think you got rid of anything, you are lying to yourself. What you do is learn better ways to cope, communicate, to solve problems. You learn to accept defeats gracefully and move on because tomorrow is another day. Some things are not worth fucking up the rest of your life for. Life is a bit like climbing a ladder. You are where you are on the ladder. When you feel secure, you reach out a free hand for the next rung, whatever that is for you. You grab hold of it, and you pull yourself up. You never try to kick out the rung that you are standing on first. That’s just fucking stupid. You focus on what you want and rung by rung, you reach out and pull yourself up. When you get enough rungs between you and that first rung, well, it’s always there, but you just don’t think about it so much any more. Cog’s Philosophy of Life, 101
Agreed. That is why I stated that I had been able to let go of the reactive behavior. The shit is still there, I just don’t react to it in the manner I used to.
I couldn’t agree more (well I could but I wouldn’t give you the pleasure of labeling me as being obsequious) that you don’t kick out the rung you are standing on. In fact, there is value in identifying what is your starting point of internal change. Much like a story, we don’t erase the first chapter when we get to the third, but rather view it as an existent prerequisite to the chapter we are now engaged in writing. The important thing to keep in mind is that it is indeed OUR story, and letting someone else control the narrative is ridiculous. (I hope I beat that metaphor hard enough)
Funny how some of these “days” really stand out as milestones for our growth, although it is usually more of a gradual process, sometimes there is that “specific day”. I have a couple and I view them in a very positive light. (Skriten’s coping manual, p.38-40)
Loved the exerpt, can’t wait to read the rest of the book. I pity the next self depreciating, world blaming, loser that walks blindly through the open door of AR.
The fact that there is a cup at all is remarkable but then it somehow produces some water? Now that is fucking amazing. Well, unless you live in a universe where cups and water naturally occur on a regular basis. I’m curious about the properties of the water? Do you think it’s real water or imaginary? Could it be ocean water, from a lake, or some sort of cammel piss from Allah? Should I risk tasting it? Is it radioactive? How did it get here in the first place? Is it man made or did it occur naturally? What’s the clarity? Are there micro-organisms in it? Is it safe? Is it dangerous. Do you think I could grow a plant with it? Which question should I try to answer first?
… oh, maybe just one-quarter full? That makes it three-quarters empty. Is somebody too bitchy if they point out how empty it is? Or maybe too slap-happy if they are overjoyed at having a quarter of the glass filled? What if it’s the other way around? Three-quarters full, but one-quarter empty? Does the person pointing out the emptiness get his balls kicked? (Which, potentially, could drain his cup down to only one-quarter full.) Is the person happy with the three-quarters full justified in his/her glee?