Just so that it is stated somewhere:
I have thought and said all the stuff y’all are saying and probably more. I didn’t care as much as you seem to, but I certainly said things and thought things comparable.
My happy life… The feeling I now have in chest and the peace in my mind…this is how I know that God is patient, kind, merciful, quiet, all the things listed in 1 Corinthians 13 and scores and scores more.
I didn’t have to make some gaudy show of repentance or perform any other arbitrary form of worship to know God. I just had to care enough to try to find the truth of something undefined in my heart, stated or unstated on paper and start living it…
If you have done that already and are at peace in your life, you already know God–regardless of what you think He looks like, regardless of how you think knowing Him should feel.
If you are comforted in times of distress and experience the quiet perfection of joy, without a word being said. In my opinion, you already know God.
I had read the footprints poem before, with no impact, but with this concept in mind, I wept. It didn’t have to be written by apostles, to be meaningful. Perhaps (or perhaps not) it will be meaningful for you too.
One night I dreamed a dream.
As I was walking along the beach with my Lord.
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,
One belonging to me and one to my Lord.
After the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that at many times along the path of my life,
especially at the very lowest and saddest times,
there was only one set of footprints.
This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it.
“Lord, you said once I decided to follow you,
You’d walk with me all the way.
But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I don’t understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me.”
He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you
Never, ever, during your trials and testings.
When you saw only one set of footprints,
It was then that I carried you


