Ha! Shows what YOU know. My hands are stainless steel now. Got the upgrade a few years ago. Got tired of the funky white corrosion every time I got splashback while taking a piss.
I think it’s just “hers,” as “her” family would kick “her” out if they found out.
Yeah, “we” decided to raise the kid (even though I’m NOT the dad - that’s not what I said at all lol), as the dad decided to dip, but that’s because he didn’t like “her” anymore. But, yeah, saving up money would be useful…I should get a job or beg for money on the internet or something. But never child support. I will DIE before taking it. It’s one of the worst things on the surface of the planet. It should die.
True. But thank you for answering my question this time.
right answer. It is JUST HER business. You are there for support. If you love her, then support and caresses.
Yes you are “the Dad” if you take on that role. That is the role and responsibility you will have for the child once born. For the rest of its life. The biological male that happened to impregnate the girl is just that. A passing sperm donor. Unless he (it) takes an interest in the child and monetarily supports it it is no more “Dad” than I am.
So? Still doesn’t prevent your little swimmers from doing their job if “placed” in the right location. And for all we know, she could have gotten you drunk and taken advantage of you.
Well, she better decide something soon. Ain’t gonna be easy to keep it a secret for too long.
FWIW, very admirable of you. That is a huge undertaking of responsibility. At the very least, you are giving that young lady options, support, and a safe place in which to make difficult decisions. This has to be an extremely scary time for her, especially if she gets no support from her own family. Much respect to you.
You still don’t get it? I’M the one who got pregnant lol.
I meant the biological dad. But since I’m trans, yes, I would be the dad.
Well I was already gonna do that, but you don’t have to sound so scary when you say that lol. ‘FOREVER’
I diagree.
No, there are non-biological fathers and biological fathers. I tend to prefer to stick with the biological one considering it can do HORRENDOUS damage to a child if their biological father isn’t there.
Uh, 2 problems, I’m both (1) trans AND the (2) one who got pregnant, also a girl DID try to rape me before (she thought that I was a dude, and didn’t know that I’m trans), so it wouldn’t surprise me if it did happen.
Yeah, it’s not, they think my symptoms are of undernourishment, and are gonna take me to the doctor soon, and I’m worried they’ll find out that way.
Considering that the said “young lady” is me, I’d say it IS actually pretty scary. This was the first time I’d ever almost thrown up just thinking about something.
Well then… THAT certainly does change the narrative a bit. Umm, not-for-nothin’, but perhaps you could have maybe led off with that rather significant detail? Certainly would have saved a bunch of time and misunderstandings. So, just to be clear…
You are a biological female living as a male. Check.
YOU are the teenager who is pregnant. Check.
Your parents do not know of your pregnancy (yet), and will NOT be thrilled to learn about it. Check.
The “father” (sperm donor) of the baby has fled the scene and is of no help. Check.
(Please correct me on any of these if I am wrong.)
Now, with that established, I have a couple of questions.
Who is the “we” that have decided to keep the baby?
Do you have any other friends/family that might be of some support to you?
Next Question: and very important, Which Country are you in? If you are in the USA, Which state are you in. Confidentiality laws can vary from state to state. Several states allow grandparents or other adult relatives to be involved in place of the minor’s parents, and many waive parental involvement requirements if there is a medical emergency or the young person is the victim of abuse or neglect.
Most states require the permission of one parent for an abortion.
Now, If you plan on keeping the child… The decision has been made. Your life is already moving down this road. Prenatal care can be given in every state without parental consent. As a pregnant minor, you are never alone. You hold your own confidentiality.
Thanks for clarifying that Tin Man. It does put a whole different spin on the mess Drew is in.
I reiterate to Drew that there is no “Atheist” response. I am human I respond as a father, grandfather an long term foster parent.
You have decided to keep and raise the baby. That is your right as the one carrying the fetus.
The biological father (semen donor) has no interest in you or the child? Or is he going to support you? . He is liable for child support and can get access anytime he decides to go to court. Does he want to be a Dad?
Your parents also have to support you as you are a minor. Whether they approve or not. They also have parental rights over your situation. Unless you live in one the States in the US that has different or religious based laws.
Where I live you can leave home, as a pregnant teen the State government will house you, find you subsidised housing once you have the child, arrange childcare so you can complete your education.
This is what I am gettingat in my post. Depending on where you are at, the laws can vary significantly. Your problem is legal and emotional, not atheistic. Find out your legal position in the state where you reside. Then you will need to find a way to deal with that specific situation emotionally. If you are a part of an atheist community, I imagine you can find some sort of support there. Sadly, the atheist support groups have not been in business as long as the religious support groups to they are few and far between. Look for some in your area.
Emancipation laws may also be your friend. How closse to your 18th birthday are you. When I was doing social work, California basically stopped giving a shit at 17. By the time they caught a 17 year old and managed to take them to Juvenile court, they would be 18. There was just no point in it. If a child went out on their own at 17, just wave goodbye.
I personally left home at 16. Never had any problems… Of course I was male, and a monkley. There is always work for monkeys.
Not “sperm donor” (I don’t like it when anyone calls a biological father that when they never were actually a sperm donor - in fact, I HATE it) but yes, he fled. But because he didn’t like me, and felt like he would not be ready to be a dad neither am I, but here we are).
Alright.
I was just saying that as a joke since you were all confused about that. Lol. Though my current boyfriend might be willing to stay for it, he said he was neutral on it. We would still be friends, either way. (He’s my best friend, technically.)
My best friend/current boyfriend, and my gay Men’s Rights Activist (MRA) friend in the UK. Also probably the people on the Men’s Rights Discord (anyone is welcome - Men's Human Rights), though I haven’t checked with them yet. Probably some people on Reddit, and possibly men’s advocate friend in India (bisexual male) and my men’s advocate friend in Spain (lesbian). And some other people. I’m not sure about my friend in Texas. This one girl at school who’s already gone through this and kept her son Julian (she doesn’t like abortion, but would not stop other people having one, and she didn’t have one even though the guy who knocked her up tried to pay her to get one) is willing to help me. I won’t tell my teachers or staff or certain people at my school since they might tell my mom, and I would get kicked out. But yeah, most are only a possibility. Only a couple are confirmed.
Yes, I live in the US, Washington.
I already looked it up, Washington does NOT require it. But, I would NOT get one. Other people can, but I’d DIE before getting one, even if going through the pregnancy would cost me my life. Other people can get one - but it’d ruin my life. I’d feel terrible. It’s scary, but I’m not going to adopt out either. I’m keeping it.
Yup.
It’s scary, but I’ll do it.
Is it free? I can’t get it otherwise.
Well, I’m glad.
Yup.
Apparently I confuse people too much sometimes, if all of you were confused on that.
Perhaps, but said atheist responses tend to lean one way more than the other, such as for abortion and gay rights (pro in both cases, with very small responses being anti). Which is the only reason I asked.
Though I’m glad you guys haven’t tried pressuring me into getting one. One girl did, and I hated it.
Yes, I have made that decision. And I realize I can’t go in the military anymore, but the whole trans thing complicated it anyway, so that’s out the window. And being a parent will make life harder - I understand this - but I was stupid (not starting off with a condom, only putting it on later), so I have to take responsibility for my choice. I think it’s time for me to grow up and finally own up to my mistakes. I’m going to take on this responsibility, even if it kills me.
Everyone needs to stop calling him a “sperm donor” or “semen donor.” I hate that, and it’s certainly not making me feel better.
I don’t care if he supports ME. I just care if he supports the child.
I would rather be gang-raped, tortured and mutilated, circumcised the male way (that’s scary - especially considering how much skin it takes), beaten, shot, and then drowned before taking it. I HATE child support. I wish it didn’t exist, but then again you don’t get everything you want. I would rather suffer through torture than take it. If he doesn’t want to get involved, I’m not gonna drag him along.
Even if I need it, I would rather DIE than taking child support.
Sorry for my rant, but it’s how I really feel.
He can have child custody (half - I love shared custody) any time he wants. If he wants to be involved, that’s his choice. If he does not want to be involved, that’s his choice. I’m pro-choice, afterall.
Not currently, but he may later. I told him how he can reach me if he ever DOES want to be an active parent or just to talk to me, so he knows he’s allowed to come at any time.
He’s lucky I’m a Father’s Rights Activist on top of a Men’s Rights Activist. If I was anti-Father’s Rights, he wouldn’t be so lucky.
Considering I’m almost 18, and they could sign me away at 16 as a legal adult if they wanted (they told me that some time ago and kept threatening me with it), that might change.
Like what specifically?
Like what? I’m confused.
I wonder if that’s where I am (Washington, Spokane).
Guess I’ll look it up.
But I’m almost 18 (literally less than 10 days away), so it depends on how long they determine said teen age range would be.
I shall find that out.
I’ll look for those, but I’ll have more luck with the Men’s Rights group I’m in on Discord (Men's Human Rights), which they’re actually pretty supportive of people and LGBT, so I don’t think I’ll have a problem with them. I certainly have gotten support from my gay MRA Christian (probably conservative, at least in some of his beliefs) friend. I’ll have to find the atheist ones, though. Friendly Atheist banned me from their site and attacked me so many times without listening to my side, so I can’t turn to atheists like them.
I’ll certainly look for them.
Less than 10 days.
Problem is, I have no where to turn, and the one place I can turn, is in Seattle. And I have to finish my high school degree at my alternative school (I failed 3 years of high school, and I’m a Senior currently, or in the last year of school).
If I had somewhere to turn, I would have a while ago. Some members in my family are abusive, and I’m lucky the physical abuse hasn’t happened so much more recently (except I was pushed very hard once, but that’s the extent of the physical during the pregnancy).
What has being male got to do with this? Where I come from, and where my friends come from, you have less options when leaving as a male than as a female. Since I identify as male, though, it complicates things, with some being willing to take me as female or reject me for my identification.