And what a well deserved beating it was.
I still have severe ringing in my left ear.
All the parts human body got together to have a debate and decide who should be boss.
The hands said it should be boss, as having opposable thumbs gave man the ability to be a toolmaker, and set primates apart from all other species.
The feet were next, claiming that without them, man would be unable to travel, hunt, explore, and that because of them mankind had climbed down from the trees and become uber and therefore they should be boss.
The mouth said it should be boss - as after all without it, man wouldn’t be able to eat or communicate.
Next was the nose - it claimed it should be boss because without it, food would taste like shit and you’d have to breathe through your mouth.
And then the brain, who had waited patiently for all the nonsense to subside, said it allowed man to think, and obviously it should be boss.
Then the arsehole attempted to state its case, but the rest of the body roared with laughter, not even allowing it to finish a sentence.
So the arsehole closed up.
After a few days, the hands became weak, the feet became wobbly, the nose lost the ability to smell, the mouth couldn’t eat and the brain became foggy.
After which they all pleaded with the arsehole to open up.
Which just goes to show, you don’t need to be a brain to be boss, just an arsehole.
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“He who lives by the sword shall die by the sword.”… Hmmm… 
… Rather takes on a whole new meaning when applied to male porn stars.
Three women talking about their husbands and the nicknames they have for them.
First women says, "I call my husband “Long John” because he’s long and his name be John.
Second women says, "I call my husband, “Big Ben” because his name is Ben and he be big.
The thrid woman says, “I call my husband Grand Marinier.”
The fist woman says, "Grand Mariner? What’s that?
The second woman laughs out loud and says, “Honey, that be one of them fancy Liquors.”
The women are either Jamaican or Pirates or both.
Plus. I don’t get the joke. Speaking of head. This one went right over mine.
Pretty much everythiing goes over your head ratty. That’s why you keep getting stuck in one silly belief system after another. You don’t worry your little head about it. Someone will come along and explain it to you.
My head is abnormally small for my body. I’m a husky Scottish man, but me ‘ead in’nt a’right for me frame.
It also doesn’t help that I was dropped on my head as a baby, or that during birth my mother couldn’t push me out and I turned blue and prolably sufferrrred brrrabrrrrabbbrain damage.
And why you’re mine 
. I got the joke.
…(whispering)… Psssst… hey, ratty… grand marnier… fancy liquor… girl’s boyfriend… fancy licker… you’re welcome…
If you need an excuse; that one is as good as any. You just keep living it like it’s important.
What happens when you go into a mausoleum?
Answer, remains to be seen.
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