On the topic of Morals & Ethics, that’s a whole can of worms unto itself that has been run through the wringer on this site so much it has had everybody’s ears bleeding. So let’s just leave that one alone for the time being, shall we? On the other hand, the subject of “Free Will” (in accordance to the bible and its teachings) is actually rather entertaining and amusing to me. And as is usual for me on subjects like that, I prefer to keep it as simple as possible. I actually touched on it a bit in one of my earlier replies, but I’ll lay out my whole view here free of all the other clutter. A couple of things to establish first (according to the bible and what I was taught from it)…
God is All-knowing, All-powerful, All-benevolent, and absolutely PERFECT.
God has a PERFECT PLAN that CANNOT be changed.
God is responsible for making EVERY SINGLE HUMAN that has ever existed or that ever will exist. And he made each human PERFECT in his image in order to fulfill his PERFECT Plan.
Therefore, according to these three fundamental Christian teachings, your role and your actions in this whole goat-rope have been PRE-DETERMINED loooooong before you ever even came into existence. In which case, I find it absolutely hysterical when a Christian tells me their god has given me “free will” to do as I please, and I am responsible if I disobey him. Usually that is when I point out they agreed with those three basic teachings, and then go on to tell them, “I cannot change your god’s Perfect Plan any more than you can. Furthermore, if your god made me perfect as part of his plan, then are you saying god made a mistake by making me who I am?” (You should here the stuttering and stammering I typically get with that. ) And then for the big whammie I tell them, “So, if your god made me who I am, and he made me perfect as part of his plan, then he made me this way for his purpose, and I have no control over how he uses me. Therefore, how could I possibly decide to do anything different from what he wants without changing his plan? Are you now telling me I am more powerful than your god?” (At THAT point they tend to get mad and end the discussion. )
Yep. Pretty much. One minor (yet vital) difference, though… With Cog, avoid standing directly in front of him for at least three hours after he drinks his smoothie. But avoid standing directly BEHIND me for three hours. (Oh, and keep me away from any open flames.)
Oh FUCK! There is no dealing with Tin when he gets this way. Mine is bigger than yours, bla bla bla… It’s best just to humor him. WOW Tin, Mt. St. Helen! Tell us more, tell us more! I can’t wait!
Are you patronizing me? I feel like I’m being patronized. I mean, I could be mistaken, but there just seemed to be a weeee-little-bit of sarcasm in your remarks. I simpy just didn’t feel any REAL sincerity in your request. Your “enthusiasm” was not very convincing. Work on it, and get back to me. And then MAYBE… juuuuust maybe… I will be willing to regale you with stories of premature eruptions.
Patronizing? Me! No no no no! Why would I ever do that? Sarshasm, srchamsem, samrchams, I can’t even spell the word. Just calm down there little oily buddy. Look here, I have some used WD40 straws you can chew on. Please continue your story. We all just love hearing about your explosive power.
Ya know, I can’t be certain, but it just seems there is STILL a touch of smarchasem… uh, carspasm… (shit)… sparchasm… (DAMMIT!)… SARCASM… (See what you’ve done?)… in your tone. So, nope. Not convinced of your sincerity. My epic stories of involuntary volatile pressure release will just have to wait. And stop trying to bribe me with the WD-40 straws. I’m not THAT easy. (But, uh, just for the sake of clarification, how many do you have, exactly?)
Yea,well, I only had 3. You caught me. It was gonna be a gotcha moment if you accepted. Anyway. I’m sure we will hear more about your amazing Tin exploits later.
I gave the straws to my hamster but after eating the first one, well, chewing it up and stuffing it in his cheeks, he has just been sitting there and staring at the other two. He has not twitched a muscle in 24 hours now. Wow. How Zen!
Have you ever considered HE might be afraid to go to sleep because maybe he thinks YOU are always staring at HIM? Huh? Ever think of THAT? Poor little psychopathic hamster.
Ohhhh Mannnn. Why didn’t you tell me about that open flame shit first! I was just following directions. Step 1: Dip hamster in brake cleaner. Then I was waiting just like you said. But it’s cold outside and he looked really cold, all stiff, sitting there on the plate, dripping with brake cleaner. At first, I was going to use a blow dryer, but what the heck, I’m in the kitchen and the matches are right by the stove. I wasn’t even near the little guy when I struck the match. The little guy vanished with a loud pop and a puffy fuzzball of smoke. I’m gonna miss that gerb… um… hamster.
Re: WordMush - “I have no idea, I’m autistic I don’t get the abstract. It’s not going to be possible for me to read that stuff maybe someday not anytime soon.”
Howdy, Mush. Good to have you back. Now, to expand a bit on the remark you made about how “abstract” the bible is…
Consider this for a moment… God (in all his infinite greatness, power, and knowledge) wants ALL of his precious humans (except for those billions who lived and died prior to the advent of Christianty) to follow all his perfect rules so that they can all be with him in heaven when they die. Therefore, this all-knowing/all-powerful being decides that the best way to spread his vital message to his human pets is to have his PERFECT WORDS written down in a book over the course of several hundred years, by multiple different aurthors, and translated across multiple languages. And this was done during time periods when a VAST MAJORITY of the human population were TOTALLY ILLITERATE. No worries, though, because that is why god made priests/churches who were controlled by power-hungry kings/royalty. (Or was it the kings/royalty who were controlled by the priests/churches? Hmmm…) Anyway, as if that were not bad enough, many passages of the Holy Bible were written in such an abstract convoluted manner that they were left open for interpretation in so many areas that countless highly educated scholars have been debating their meanings over several centuries. And the results of those debates so far?.. Literally hundreds of different Christian sects/denominations across the world, with each one believing THEY are the ONLY ones who TRULY follow god’s word. And let’s not forget the countless wars waged between these various sects in the name of their loving god, along with the untold number of innocent men, women, and children who were often brutally slain because of some ridiculous and/or abstract “rule” in that Holy Book. (I could go on and on, but you get the point.)
So, with that in mind, it baffles me to no end how ANYBODY could believe the bible is the PERFECT WORD of some ALL-POWERFUL/ALL-KNOWING entity. The very fact it is so terribly abstract, vague, contradicting, and filled with so many errors regarding science/nature is in DIRECT conflict with the god claim. If the bible was truly perfect, there would be NO NEED for any translations/interpretations. EVERYBODY would be able to FULLY understand everything in it the moment they read it, regardless of age, education, or mental status. OR… better yet… WHY THE FUCK WOULD THAT GOD NEED A BOOK AT ALL? Why can’t this ALL-POWERFUL god simply implant exactly what his human pets need to know directly into their brains? But - hey - what the hell do I know? I’m just a stupid godless heathen… (shrugging shoulders)…
Like adding cherry flavor to a condom.
Like adding tits to a butterfly.
Like doing a Jell-O shot from a chicken’s ass.
Like milking a cow with no arms or legs.
Like melting down a Tin Man into something useful.
Some things are just amazing.
In case anybody was wondering, that is called a “Clammy Cackle” if it’s a hen. If from a rooster’s ass, though, it’s called a “Slippery Cock”. Trust me, you do NOT want to get those two mixed up.
) And then for the big whammie I tell them, “So, if your god made me who I am, and he made me perfect as part of his plan, then he made me this way for his purpose, and I have no control over how he uses me. Therefore, how could I possibly decide to do anything different from what he wants without changing his plan? Are you now telling me I am more powerful than your god?” (At THAT point they tend to get mad and end the discussion. 
I can’t wait!
I feel like I’m being patronized. I mean, I could be mistaken, but there just seemed to be a weeee-little-bit of sarcasm in your remarks. I simpy just didn’t feel any REAL sincerity in your request. Your “enthusiasm” was not very convincing. Work on it, and get back to me. And then MAYBE… juuuuust maybe… I will be willing to regale you with stories of premature eruptions.
) Anyway, as if that were not bad enough, many passages of the Holy Bible were written in such an abstract convoluted manner that they were left open for interpretation in so many areas that countless highly educated scholars have been debating their meanings over several centuries. And the results of those debates so far?.. Literally hundreds of different Christian sects/denominations across the world, with each one believing THEY are the ONLY ones who TRULY follow god’s word. And let’s not forget the countless wars waged between these various sects in the name of their loving god, along with the untold number of innocent men, women, and children who were often brutally slain because of some ridiculous and/or abstract “rule” in that Holy Book. (I could go on and on, but you get the point.)
!!!