I think my brother blocked me on Facebook

He is taking this harder than my sister did when she first found out I do not believe in the Christian god anymore, nor any other god.

High as fuck, so I wont type anymore than this as I might place in something stupid.

Make your major decisions and hold important conversations while 100% sober, and understand that religion is incredibly divisive.

3 Likes

I was I only got high later.
And if he wont look into the science of it and actually use his brain on it, I am done. It isn’t for me to decide to believe in what science has to say on the matter, as I have done that already. But I can not decide something for someone else.

I wonder how my parents will react when I tell them.

Do you have to?

My parents were devout theists, and I pondered on whether to inform them of my lack of beliefs. But I also asked myself “why”? What good will come of this?

I made the conscious decision not to be honest with my parents because I could not see any good coming from it, and only grief for my parents.

Am I a liar? YES. But I was willing to sacrifice my integrity in order to spare my parents grief.

2 Likes

@FievalJ

You’re brother has every right to feel the way he does. It is your own expectations that I suspect let you down. Surely you don’t expect him to change his views overnight, or even his feelings? He might never change his beliefs. Accept that. He is your brother. Don’t let the topic get between the both of you. If you insulted him in any way. apologize and make amends with him. Life is too short to lose family over quibbles. In times of troubles all your friends will disappear but if you’re fortunate enough, family will be there for you. Don’t let pride get in the way of family.

When I sat down to tell my mom, her reaction and words were golden. She was and is a devout theist. She asked me why i didn’t believe. Her response: You may be right… and she left it at that.

Edited to add: When I decided to tell Mom it was merely to point out where i was in life and my thoughts and I had no intention to make her question her beliefs.

.

1 Like

Hmmm
I don’t have to, but at least I can get out of having to get involved in prayer and the like. Unless I move out soon. Then it won’t matter for a long time.
Unlike in your case I don’t think I’ll cause them grief as they’re not exactly devout theists, but it will take a lot of explaining and they’ll probably tell the rest of the family slowly. That might be a problem. Seems unnecessary.
Thanks…it kinda helped.

@aketo Please consider all of the negatives and positives that may result from informing others.

When I made my decisions, the only benefit for my personal perspective was that I could pat myself on the back because I was honest and open. For me, a moment of self congratulation was not worth the possible negative repercussions of being disowned, or imparting great turmoil and grief on my parents.

3 Likes

Whenever I have to make a major decision (and coming out to a family member is a MAJOR decision) I make sure I have been clean and sober for at least a complete week. I know from my own habits that for a few days after, I still feel the effects of the pot.

THC can be detected from 3 days to a month in urine, up to 48 hours in saliva, and 36 hours in blood.

2 Likes

Yeah. My mum was always pretty good about the atheism of all four of her children. She was a devout Catholic. She loved her children and wanted to see them along with any grandchildren.

My father was an emotional abuser and a bully. His reaction was very different. Also a devout Catholic. He blew his stack. He didn’t actually disown us. He simply sniped at us whenever we saw him. My response was to see him as little as possible. That meant I did not see my mother as often as I wanted.

Of course everyone has right to their beliefs, that includes me. I also have the right not to be bullied or abused, by anyone.

Whether I would bother with the brother would depend on how close we were and just how much I wanted him in my life. I have never accepted the mantra of my family (or country) right or wrong. Family gets away with a lot more than non family, but there are still limits.

Actually my brother didn’t block me, he deleted his Facebook. He’s that offended that he’s pretty much shutting off from him anything which displeases him. I can not open a person’s mind who refuses to learn any other way.

@FievalJ

I don’t even know why you would say or think that about your brother unless you questioned his beliefs or if you didn’t then your expectations have been let down. If you cherish your brother then be the bigger man and step up to the plate, regardless of how justified you may feel that you are right and he is wrong.

My sibling has changed religions so many time we couldn’t keep up. I know my family and friends well enough to know how to approach them or even what to say or not say and when I don’t know I keep silent. When I was younger I would flap my mouth and then get the unexpected negative reactions but I learned along the way. It was my expectations that let me down back then.

With some I preferred the peace and relationships while with others it didn’t matter.
The first question you need to ask yourself is if you want your brother in your life and then take it from there.

@boomer 47

I’m totally on board with that. There are family members that are toxic or worse and should be kept at a distance if not completely out.