Ok this one leaped out at me. A few years back in the UK, cold callers were randomly calling people. The call went like this:
Them: Hello is that Mr so and so?
Me: Who’s calling sorry? (fuck them, they’ve called me )
Them: This is so and so phoning on behalf of X, is this Mr so and so?
Me: Sorry, what is this regarding? (again fuck em, they phoned me)
Them: Well mr so and so (cheeky presumptuous cunt) our records show that you were recently involved in a traffic collision, and we wondered if you had legal representation?
Now from this point I choose to go one of two ways:
Oh yeah I was, but I didn’t stop as that family looked ok, and to be perfectly honest I’d had a couple of beers and done a few lines of cocaine, you know how it is. HELLO! HELLO! call ended…
Me: Oh really, and where did you get those records?
Them: Er, well we got them online.
Me: Oh right, where online?
Them: So were you involved in a traffic accident Mr so and so?
Me: Well what do your records say?
Them: Er, they say you were.
Me: I see, and where did you get these records from online?
Them: That’s not really important, but I wondered if you currently have legal representation?
Me: Oh I think it is very important, as you seem to have lied in order to solicit business for a legal firm. HELLO! HELLO! call ended…
You see this was the perfect opportunity for those employees to falsely confess to all manner of shit, and fuck with their mendacious employers, who wouldn’t have a legal leg to stand on. Sometimes life is just good…