Jehovah's Witness

You ever get a knock on your door?

I have in the past from them. But now it seems Baptists and Methodists are doing door to door now. My ex wife couldn’t stand them. My mom hates them. She told me to put an American Flag in my yard because they’re against nationality.

I made a wise crack the other day. I went on the river with my girlfriend’s mom, her brother, and their friends. We started playing 1 truth and 2 lies. One lie was that I was a Jehovah’s Witness.

Everyone, their friends, backed away. But my girlfriend and her mom knew that it was a lie because they’re Atheists too. They knew I was a joking.

When I came out about the Jehovah’s Witness part being a lie. Their friends all laughed in relief and started talking about how warped JW’s are.

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IMO: it is no more crazy than believing God sacrificed himself, to himself, two thousand years ago, to forgive you in the present for someone stealing an apple six thousand years ago. That sounds like a story you’d hear from a schizophrenic crackhead.


There is a quote from Diderot , (as I’m sure many of you know )…

· “The Christian God is a father who cares more for his apples than for his children.”


I always heard it was his ‘bananas.’ That’s the way my mommy explained it to me. "The great furry God of the banana tree, cares more for bananas than for me. So when I jump from tree to tree and slip and fall into the weeds, and tigers come to clean my bones, the Great furry God of the banana tree, sees my bones beneath the tree, he chortles, “silly monkey.”


I got a recent letter in the mail.

A copy printed - he signed it. No effort. JW invite to summer assembly and directed to the (website).

The guy said he was an older, retired fart … part of me wanted to write him back :smiling_imp: BUT he’s wasted his life already and knows it

It’s sad. And pathetic.

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They’ve stopped coming here, none for several years.

Was a time they would get about 30 seconds, when I would ask if they were JW’s. If yes, I simply said “no thank you” and closed the door.

A few years ago ago I put a ‘Do not knock, No Sales people’ notice on my door.
I told the bloke who spoke that the sign meant him too. That he was selling religion and I didn’t want any, and closed the door.

Here, JW’s sometimes have very well presented children with them. What’s the go? Is that because they think people are less likely to be nasty with children present ? Or perhaps to instill that smug inner glow of martyrdom as early as possible? Or are they too mean to pay for a babysitter?

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Post the letter and we will have a competition. Best reply gets to reply.

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:confused:. I threw it away so I wouldn’t be tempted to torture the guy…his address and phone number were on the letter. I real life I can exercise restraint.

The letter was basically a play on Covid (fear) and the Kingdom promise from the Creator.

I wanted to just write :writing_hand: “What doesn’t kill you, mutates and tries again…”

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Reply to his letter, inform him you are spending that time at Turtle Lake Resort.

If he Googles that name, it will inform him it is a nudist camp. roflmao.


I had a close friend (a paramedic, and my immediate supervisor) whom was a Jehova’s Witness.

He died because he refused a blood transfusion after surgery for gall bladder stones.

He left behind a wife, children, and friends whom needed him.

And all because of an obscure passage about eating blood products from a Bronze Age book.


I made the same decision as a JW.

I almost died.

That experience was what prompted me to leave. To actually start living the life I knew I had and to realize I was only accepted and loved for who I was suppose to be instead of who I was.


An excellent point that I wish Gary had considered.

Glad you’re still with us. I’ve always thought that particular JW belief is especially bloody minded (ahem) . Seems to me to be based on a willful misinterpretation of a rather obscure passage in the new testament. Specifically, Acts 15:20 “Instead we should write to them, telling them to abstain from food polluted by idols, from sexual immorality, from the meat of strangled animals and from blood.”

That passage clearly refers to Jewish dietary law, which requires all animals to be drained of blood before being eaten.

Of course, it’s a pretty simple way to make themselves stand out and to see themselves as ‘special’ and persecuted. I suspect a person dying for refusing a transfusion when their life could be saved by a transfusion might be seen as a martyr.

What I find especially troubling is the emphasis on ritual rather than moral law. Common enough in Christendom I guess.

My catholic mother refused to give birth in a catholic hospital. The reason was/is that a catholic hospital puts the life of the baby first. If it comes to a choice, they will save the baby and let the mother die.

Mum’s reasoning (as she told me) was; " I have a husband and other children who need me. I can have another baby."


I only know that the watch tower people vacate quickly when my response to let us help you is “no you’re my guests, I insist I help you understand the universe we exist within. “

Fuck wits would walk in my flower beds to get by me on the sidewalk.


That is well and truly fucked up.

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